The Future of Compact Discs (or, Have a Kunaki Chip Cookie!)

just words

I must think I’m pretty smart.

What do you think?

Today I’m going to make some predictions.

This will help, as time goes by and my predictions become true, demonstrate my amazingness (he said while typing on a little computer in bed in his sweats).

First off, I predict Chloe Kohanski will win “The Voice.” Those of you who follow popular music probably think I’m cheating a little, since the competition was over last week, and Chloe actually did win … But I predicted it in November!

Already hard to keep up, huh?

In Chloe’s case, I didn’t actually call the winner, but I saw it comin’!

Now it’s time for some new predictions!

Flat out, clear, and no nonsense!

THE NEW WORLD ORDER CONTINUED

I predict compact discs will become obsolete someday … but not any time soon, as they represent the last vestige of good old fashioned hold-it-in-your-hands gift-giveable actual physical goods Continue reading “The Future of Compact Discs (or, Have a Kunaki Chip Cookie!)”

Craigslist – The Great Poker Game

blog banner with peace sign

I’ve mentioned the dinosaurs walking Earth, eBay and Amazon. But what about Craigslist? Is it even worth a mention? What’s it all about, and why isn’t it in the news until someone gets busted when a personal massage goes wildly wrong?

Craigslist must not be important. Ebay would have bought it, or Google by now. It’s just an anomaly, floating out there with no big impact …

craigslist logo green

Or is it? On the outside Craiglist is a public place, but on the inside it’s very private. Craigslist is not, as its dot-org suggests, non-profit. Continue reading “Craigslist – The Great Poker Game”

How To Live Eclipse-Free! (or, Give Me Your Eyeballs, Part 2017)

eclipse-banner

Kudos to NASA for pulling off that thing making the sun disappear this week! Just goes to show, you never know! What will disappear next?

Unfortunately, the darkness prompted wildlife in my yard to grow unusually bold, but there were no injuries.

Like a big cloud on a sunny beach day, the Monday moon created a largish shadow over fourteen states in the U.S.. The event, modeled after rare natural occurances, Continue reading “How To Live Eclipse-Free! (or, Give Me Your Eyeballs, Part 2017)”

Playing Monopoly With Cox (or, How to Get Your Google Back!)

just words

The Creature In The Light Blue Suit

No man should ever wear an entirely light blue suit. There might be a book of great advice like this, called “Awkward Things To Avoid” that my cable company, Cox Communications, got a hold of for its advertising campaigns.

cox logoHere’s a company that breaks every rule of good advertising, creating the ultimate catalog of mediocre, awkward television ads, despite being in the TV business. Probably because they’re not really in the TV business. They just use those old cables to compete with Netflix.

There’s the one where the clever college student ponders silence, which his girlfriend explains Continue reading “Playing Monopoly With Cox (or, How to Get Your Google Back!)”

Marketing as a Content Creator (or, What’s Wrong With Amazon Part 2)

Amazon Haystack Logo

OUR RELATIONSHIP ISN’T WORKING, AMAZON!

I don’t buy things on Amazon any more.

Which is odd, because I still have listings for sale on the platform. I no longer believe Amazon is a good place for any small- or medium-sized company to use for retail sales (backend seller accounts).

It all started recently, when my awareness and perspective improved over time. I’ve been an Amazon seller for a dozen years, always assuming it was the “place to be,” just because there’s lots of eyeballs on the site. But I never sold much. I thought, as anyone might, it was my fault.

THE AMAZON SELLER EXPERIENCE

Spending time in the Amazon system, as a seller, checking my listings from the back end and front, I naturally also shopped there, using Continue reading “Marketing as a Content Creator (or, What’s Wrong With Amazon Part 2)”

This One’s For You (or, Thank You For Feeling Good About Yourself!)

share the moon CD

This article is just to say thank you for subscribing to my newsletter!

dragonYou are part of a small, elite group who’ve chosen to take the plunge and voluntarily read the words of the future. I promise to provide a high quantity of words and put them into a logical order.

Seriously, though. I really do Continue reading “This One’s For You (or, Thank You For Feeling Good About Yourself!)”

25-Billion-Dollar Reward For Signing Up (Complete A Quick Action!)

That’s right! 25-billion-dollars will be given to one lucky reader!

Leprechaun

Somebody’s gonna be rich – why not you? Don’t delay, just simply give me your First Name, your Email Address, and your Eyeballs. That’s all I need. In return, you will be entered into the “Marvelous Mark Makes Me Mucho RICH” (Amazon Event Code # MMMMMR) contest, during which one lucky winner will receive 25-billion-dollars from my personal checking account, which has that much money in it.

More than that, actually. It’s not a big deal.

Or, at least I have my pride. That’s worth a lot.

And you’ll get lots of cool information and music and stuff.

beyonce
Beyonce in traditional Earth garb.

I learned years-ago (long before Facebook) there are newspapers (and this is NOT related to the above-mentioned contest) which publish front-page news stories about Obama meeting with Aliens, or Beyonce taking her dress off on a faraway planet; you know, things that are sort of far-fetched … and these papers and magazines get away with telling their fake news simply because the news is SO far-fetched no-one could possibly believe it.

I don’t know why I wanted to mention that. It’s not related.

Happy money counting!

Sign up! Don’t forget why you came here!

I love you! Whoever you are! And you can’t put a price on that!

See you in the signup list! Oh, by the way, visit the store!

Love,

(really)

(I KNOW you’re going to WIN!)

Continue reading “25-Billion-Dollar Reward For Signing Up (Complete A Quick Action!)”

The Newsletter

Sign up for my newsletter!

You’re inbox will be loved!

.

You can also go to the store and shop!

Or just sign up. That would be nice! Thanks!

(By the way, if you’re trying to be thorough, because of the 25-billion-dollar giveaway, you do NOT need to send your eyeballs in the mail; I can use them while they’re still attached to your head.)

No News is Good News! (or, Not Even Interesting!)

Hi everyone!

I wanted to give you a picture I drew years-ago at RISD of my cat, Boo Boo, who speaks fluent Spanish, but first I thought I should tell you something NOT IMPORTANT at all – so don’t worry about it, okay?

The thing is, I have my own store!

That’s all. No biggie. I’ll tell ya, there’s only two things in there Continue reading “No News is Good News! (or, Not Even Interesting!)”

Alizee Music Video! French Pop, Mon Maquis

Business lunch break: This is possibly the best music video I’ve ever seen, and I don’t speak a word of French.

It’s internationally fabulous! Click and see!

I don’t care if you’re a Pink Floyd guy or a Kid Rock girl; this video will impress you. It’s like combining British rock with French sexiness, with clear layered rhythms and a light show that’d make Korn proud!

Thanks for watching! Please leave a comment, and subscribe!! 🙂 (If you’re wondering about the “Korn” reference, they’re a hard rock band that does great light shows!) Come back frequently to view this video – she ain’t goin’ nowhere!

I’m proud to say my videos are hosted by YouTube, which is owned by Google, and they back up all this stuff to servers on the giant ringed “jewel of the solar system,” Saturn. Because of the important role eyeballs play in Google’s complicated Continue reading “Alizee Music Video! French Pop, Mon Maquis”

Your Life: Invalid Click Activity, Blame the Googleoids or Join the Club (or, “An Article With a Lot of Specific Words”)

If you think the President of the United States has a lot of money and you should be worried about it; you should be worried about Google.

The history of the universe is relatively new. Dr. Evil is real. You will never find his lair, but you’ll hear stories …

Remember when the Internet was “new,” and big publishers like the “New York Times” were so stupid they didn’t get on the bandwagon, scratching their heads while going out of business as if Google had cast a magic spell upon world commerce? You remember, it was like, a couple years ago.

ny times logoThe stupidity, in hindsight, was massive; newspapers didn’t think the Internet was important and didn’t have websites for years, while us early-adopters got excited about any poor implementation of the new electonic universe, laughing that “People” magazine doesn’t understand. But us smart ones were still scratching our heads too, wondering how Google was “doing it.” Now, instead of having figured out how Google does it, we just forgot the question, buried by emotional short-lived POTUS bashing.

All that’s happening now is just the same. You could call it invisible stupidness mixed with invisible ingenuity Continue reading “Your Life: Invalid Click Activity, Blame the Googleoids or Join the Club (or, “An Article With a Lot of Specific Words”)”